Where’s Peter Shilton gone? Come back David Seaman! All is nearly forgiven!

David James is too old, sketchy, unreliable and really not quite as good at catching a ball as England fans had once hoped. Ben Foster and Joe Hart are too young and inexperienced. And though they may get older, where exactly are they going to get their experience from? Carson and Green aren’t actually that good, are they? So are we now looking at the Watford and the Accrington Stanley keepers for the next inspiration? Well, never fear, England fans, because Paul Scholes is here! 

The referee chose to send off Paul Scholes for the handball rather than the studs in the chest

Further evidence of Paul Scholes' goalkeeping ability

Scholes tries in vain to halve the risk of one of his random handballs by pretending he only has one hand

Scholes seriously threatens his chances of replacing Edwin Van der Sar by taking one on his chest

A quick post to preview the day’s up and coming Six Nations matches and in no way whatsoever show extreme bias towards nearly-all-conquering Ireland and their glorious bid to Grand Slam everybody in Britain and a couple of those European mainlanders as well.

Before the championship decider, Italy host France in a game only Italy and France care about while England and Scotland are having their own little ding-dong down at Twickenham, and we should probably just leave them to it.

Captain Brian O'Driscoll is a little tea pot

The only item of ball-based sport that really matters today is happening at the Millennium Stadium where Ireland and Wales battle it out to be the Six Nations champions. The odds are stacked against Wales as they need to win by 13 points to take the championship on the overall points difference, but having already been defeated by France, who were smashed by England, the chance of the Grand Slam remains only for the undefeated Ireland.

Ireland are so good they have to chase themselves

It’s been 61 years since they last did it and they didn’t even call it the Grand Slam back then. It was probably just the Okay Slam. If the boys do it tonight, then from this day forward it will be known as the Bloody Marvelous Slam. G’wan Ireland!

Italy  v  France  (Stadio Flamino,  1:15pm)

England  v  Scotland  (Twickenham, 3:30pm)

Wales  v  Ireland  (Millennium Stadium, 5:30pm)

All games live on BBC 1

The All Blacks' fearsome Haka has been rendered obsolete by the Irish Okey-Cokey

An extremely rare phenomenon has been photographed by Mike Holding, a wildlife cameraman working on a BBC wildlife programme in Botswana. A pink elephant calf, most probably an albino as elephant albinos are usually a reddish-brown or pink colour, was spotted amongst a herd of around eighty elephants in the Okavango Delta.

Elephant albinos are usually pink, not white

Albinos are rare among African elephants, though not uncommon among the smaller Asian variety. Ecologist Dr Mike Chase said, ‘We have been studying elephants in the region for nearly ten years now, and this is the first documented evidence of an albino calf I have come across.’

He added that surviving this very rare phenomenon would be difficult for an elephant calf in the harsh African bush, as the glaring sun may cause blindness and skin problems.

Being in the Okavango Delta maybe the elephant calf’s great hope though, as there are many tall trees to provide shade and oodles of mud to cake itself in. Dr Chase continued, ‘Already the two-to-three-month-old calf seems to be walking in the shade of its mother. This behaviour suggests it is aware of its susceptibility to the harsh African sun, and adapted a unique behaviour to improve its chances of survival.’

A man has replaced his finger with a 2GB USB memory stick. He lost the actual finger in a motorcycle accident in the summer of 2008 when he crashed his Ducati Monster 696 motorbike (only a week after getting it) and had half the finger amputated by a hand surgeon at Helsinki Hospital, Finland. Being a software developer, the doctors treating him joked he should create a ‘finger drive’ to replace the missing digit.

Jerry Jalava, from Helsinki, wrote on his blog, ‘It is not attached permanently to my body so when I’m using the USB I just leave my finger inside the slot and pick it up when I’ve finished.’(ProtoBlogr.net)

The prosthetic finger looks relatively normal until you peel back the nail and the USB insert is revealed. He added, ‘I’m planning to use another prosthetic as a shell for the next version, which will have a removable fingertip and an RFID tag.’

Ducati Monster 696

Found these on a tabloid website, couldn’t help myself:

Comet's Roor Shelf

The next piece to be joining Comet’s collection is to be a 7mm Fairmaster, which EDIT may well be doing a deal on in the next few weeks or so.

The picture in the background was acquired at a giftshop at the Crazy Horse monument while Comet was on a motorcycle trip across the US. It is Native American artwork and did not see the light of day again until the creation of this Roor shelf. The picture below is printed at the bottom of the artwork.

Front Zip DMC/Technics 1210 Black Hoodie with Embroidered Logos.

Official DMC / Technics Merchandise with Embroidered Technics And 1210 Logos. DMC have combined with Technics to produce a brand new range of hoodies and t-shirt designs. These ultra cool pullover hoodies are extreme high quality and bear the embroidered logo of Technics.

DMC/Technics 'Headphones' Design

High Quality 100% Cotton T-shirts that have been produced to DMC’s usual high standards. This Official DMC T-shirt features exclusive designs that was used for the DMC World DJ Championships 2008 on a 100% ringspun cotton t-shirts.

• Shoulder To Shoulder Taping
• Tubular Construction For Shape Retention
• Front Cover Seaming On Collar

Size Guide: S 37/38,  M 39/40,  L 41/42,  XL 43/44

DMC/Technics 'Vinyl' Design

DMC/Technics 'Champion DJ' Design DMC/Technics 'My Mix Tapes' Design

Those of you brave enough, and willing enough, do venture forwards, but, please take note; if you enter the realms of ‘The Lair‘ you will leave the world that is familiar to you far behind.

Beyond this door is a land with a reality and frame of reference all of its own. Its creation is intended to be an adventurous, entertaining, and educational journey of discovery, enlightenment, and laughter.

Everything within revolves around a singular artistic concept. New visitors are advised to take the trouble to visit the Editors Office upon arrival for up to date briefings.

This feminized DNA Genetics Lemon Skunk strain is a cross between two Skunks, the chosen phenotype selected for its lemon characteristics. The Lemon mother has been kept for over 20 years in Las Vegas and the father was chosen here in Holland. The male was donated by Eddie, formally the owner of one of the oldest and most prestigious seed banks in the Netherlands. This original prize male was selected and used in many breeding projects throughout the years.

DNA Genetics - Lemon Skunk Feminised

MK Ultra combines the legendary G-13 with L.A.’s finest, the O.G.(Original Gangster) Kush. Winner of the 2003 High Times Cannabis Cup, Indica category.

T.H. Seeds MK Ultra Feminised

Meet TH Seeds BUKU, AKA the ancient treasure Burmese Kush! To create this mean machine, T.H. Seeds crossed the authentic Burmese Kush with the O.G. Kush from L.A. which is without a doubt the hottest thing being passed around in Cali right now.

T.H. Seeds Buku Feminised

The name says it all! Sativa Afghani Genetic Equilibrium (S.A.G.E. by TH Seeds) is a well balanced Haze, crossed with a robust Indica. Fast becoming a legend, S.A.G.E. took 2nd place in the Blind Test of the 2001 High Times Cannabis Cup, and this plant won 1st place in 2000.

T.H. Seeds S.A.G.E. Feminised